The heart wants
What it wants
Mine aches
For what it cannot have

And when I cannot have
That one desire it craves
It tortures me
With dreams and visions
Constant thoughts
Of that one thing
Beyond my arm’s reach

But when
In my imagination
I build a world
Of my own
And give my heart
Exactly what it wants
It hesitates

It wants no more

My heart is treacherous
It creates great worlds
And goodness
Then forms even greater black holes
That swallow the worlds whole

This heart is treacherous

It wants a perfection
That can never be
When one perfect thing is gone
It wants no more
It is either one perfection
Or none at all for this heart

This heart would rather reminisce
A perfect past memory
Than create fresh ones
Lest they too be tarnished

My heart aches with wanting
One day
Then wants no thing
The next

No wonder I never swear
Never hold anyone
And cling forever
Never give a second chance
When the first is gone

And when perfect people fly away
I let them fly
Even when they soar back to me
I push them
To fly away again

This heart is foolish

My mind scolds
“You only live once
Give that second or third try and see!”
My heart replies
“No thanks
I’d rather live with a dream or memory”

My heart is treacherous
it aches light and day
For that which it craves
And when faced
with that one thing –
That possibility
Of a dream come true
It’s shy
And turns away

This treacherous heart
Would rather dream
Than have

Journal: Oct.26.2020
Made of Sand
Not Dura, but Alaminadura

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