A dream deferred does not always die from being too long put aside.  Some dreams just need some more time in the pod, so that they can be born later when they are matured and ready to fly. Ever tried writing a story that just did not come? You’ve done everything, know how they story will go but when you sit down to write it, nothing helpful comes.

I have. I prepared carefully- Character profiles, plotting, and free writing- still, no satisfactory results!

I have been trying to write this story for the past four months and every time I wanted to defer it, I kept telling myself that if I put it off, I will procrastinate it for years like many other stories I have drafted and never edited or published.  Now, I realize that when a story takes a little too long to figure out, it is best to make it a memo, stick it in the idea book for future use and take another idea that feels less premature.

In addition, I realize that planning a whole story before writing it is not really my thing. Character profiles do not really work or me. I know a lot about the main characters who drive the story but not everything.  I prefer to discover my characters as the story develops instead of carving them out in stone.

Maybe I will go back to trying what I did in primary and high school when I wrote stories. A character and an ending. Like being born and dying- having only two certainties. The rest, I discover them as I journey through the story. I love not knowing what will lead to this and that. I think that is what made me love reading and writing stories. The not knowing.

So am going back to my old self. Rather than merely write a story that has mapped itself out in my mind, I want to discover it. Watch it unfurl, like a pupa growing- knowing it will be a butterfly, but not quite knowing whether it will be blue or orange or purple and yellow.

Taking a boat, an oar, and setting out to sea. Who knows where the winds will take me  🙂

Journal: Oct.26.2020
Made of Sand
Not Dura, but Alaminadura

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